Edinburgh Fringe 2015 – Daily Blog – Day 7 – Monday 10th August


In 21 years doing stand-up comedy (12 years as a professional) I don’t ever recall getting a five star review, until now!

Today I received a 5* review from www.gigglebeats.co.uk a website specialising in comedy in The North.

five stars

It’s great to get a five star review and whilst I have had a few four star reviews loads of three star reviews, I have had millions of shite reviews!



The worst one appeared on “The Page of Shame” in The Scotsman in 1997 where I was given one star!


You cannot get less than this in a review, you get one star for turning up!

If the body of Richard Pryor was dug up and left lying onstage somewhere in Edinburgh then he would get one star, however. I can’t help thinking that some sycophantic pretentious wank-pot will probably give him another star for his stillness and composure on stage!

Thankyou Mr Innes McQuillan of Gigglebeats, may this be the first of many more.






Making a Living

Doing a Free show at The Fringe is wonderful, there is the minimum of expense that is usually associated with doing a show in the traditional way, but the problem comes when I have to go to the bank with five hundredweight of change!




A large number of people put notes into the bucket at the end of every show, however, there are quite a few who put coins into the bucket and, being a responsible adult (insofar as I have bills to pay), I have to pay my earnings into the bank!

The boys and girls at my local branch of Santander are very understanding and have a wee smile when I come in rattling from all the change in my rucksack, I suspect they think I am a pretty harmless nutter at the best of times.

The advantage of all the coins is that the bag weighs a ton thus rendering you virtually “mugger proof.”

heavy bag

Anybody running past and grabbing the bag would immediately crash to the floor under its weight!

I am very grateful for the donations and it’s a great way to make a living although there are one or two shameless tossers who seem to have no problem putting small amounts of loose change into my bucket at the end of a show.


It happened tonight, this young guy came up with 10p in his hand!

ten pence







I said “Are you fuckin’ kidding?”

He said “Can I have change please”

Now that’s what I call a left turn, this guy’s a comedy genius!

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