Edinburgh Fringe 2015 – Daily Blog – Day 20 – Sunday 23rd August

There’s a big wide world out there

Sometimes you forget that there’s more to life than The Fringe, right at this precise moment I cannot for the life of me imagine what can be more important, but I’m sure there must be something!

the world





When you are in Edinburgh for The Fringe you are in an alien world inhabited by artists, actors and performers of every conceivable type who will make you gasp, laugh and cry whilst day trippers and tourists run the gauntlet of people giving out a hundred million flyers.

I then get back home and realise I have completely neglected the house.

Despite what I say in my show (beware, some of it might be utter bullshit) I’m sometimes compelled to keep the old homestead tidy by occasionally cutting the grass but unfortunately, owing to my Fringe commitments and being a lazy bastard, I haven’t bothered my arse.

a jungle




It’s a fucking jungle out there!




The Health Kick

loads of food





With all of the delicacies on offer in Edinburgh such as Nepalese Curries, French Hot Dogs, Japanese Bento Boxes and the dinners served at Auld Jocks Pie Shoppe, Myself and Her Indoors aren’t getting any thinner.

a fat belly






So, she’s gone and ordered a Treadmill!

“Where the fuck are we going to put it?”

“In the Garage” she replied

“But the Garage is jammed with crap”

garage jammed with crap2






Oh Bollocks, as usual I stood my ground and so, on top of cutting the grass I have to hire a skip and clear out the garage, what a pain in the arse!

My work / life balance hasn’t been this out of kilter since 2003 when I had a full time job!

I have a feeling my old mother will be getting a call, who, despite her advanced age and infirmity, can still graft like fuck!

Massive in Stenhousemuir

The show on Sunday night was a good show, plenty of improvised pieces and a third return visit from The Stenny FC supporters club who, unusually for a Sunday, helped to fill the room and that’s a nice bonus!






One chap who didn’t get in posted the following on Facebook:

Were too late getting to the Raymond Mearns show at the Beehive. Feeling depressed, cause the only thing we can hear is fits of laughter coming from the 2nd floor.

High Praise indeed!

The audience this evening included a family in from Ipswich, comprising Mum and Dad and their four kids aged 21, 18, 17 and 13!

Now, I have done Panto and I regularly do kids shows but this is different, this is my full blown Edinburgh Fringe show and I don’t often pull my punches.

There’s something inherently pathetic, yet hilariously funny, about starting off your show and saying very sheepishly “I erm, tend to explore some adult themes you know, from time to time”

explicit content



And, graphic content warning delivered, launched into my schtick.


What a show. The funniest moment though, was when everyone was leaving and the 13 year old was overheard saying to her Dad “What does Jailbait mean?”






I enjoyed the show tonight but I’m not proud of myself!

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